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Opposites Attract: Mac vs. PC

Robert Warming and Philip Bailey

PC

PCs are certainly the best computer option for the Belmont Hill student.  PCs, unlike Macs, provide infinite options for laptops, tablets, and desktops.  Want a gaming computer?  We got that (Alienware Area 51).  Want a computer to just do school work?  We got that (Dell Latitude 15 3000).  Want a state-of-the-art search engine?  Umm, we have Bing?  But enough of the hyperbole.  PC users are all about the technicalities.  On average, PCs offer 3.45 times as much RAM (random-access memory) as Macs.  And Macs don’t offer anything more than two terabyte hard drives.  And Macs’ processors only have four cores.  And Macs just don’t have the ports that a modern day consumer needs.  My PC has a DVD drive, a floppy disk drive, a tape slot, and a telegram receiver so I never need to worry about missing out on my multimedia.  

PCs are great for students because they offer both economical and acceptable choices for their technological needs.  PCs start at $99 and end at $799, because anyone with more than $800 isn’t too cheap to buy a Mac.  Microsoft Windows is both innovative and reliable.  It’s been thirty years since Windows 1.0 was released, and we at Microsoft are proud of such a sound and storied foundation.  With what we’ve learned in the past, we will be able to continue to evolve the Windows operating system to fit the needs of students and customers everywhere.


Mac

Hi, I’m a Mac, and I’m cooler than you because of it.  We at Apple pride ourselves at being the best re-inventors out there.  We rehashed the tablet, the phone, and even the watch.  Our sleek and sexy design makes up for what we lack in real power, but that’s not an issue (did I mention that we’re pretty?).

Macs represent change.  In the computer world, we need real leadership.  We need a system that will be bold and not care what others say.  I’ll be frank: PCs are ruining this country.  I think the big problem this country has is being PC. I’ve been challenged by so many people and I don’t, frankly, have time for total PC. And to be honest with you, this country doesn’t have time, either.  You know, it really doesn’t matter what the media writes as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of silicon.  

Look, I could go on all day about how Macs offer more than PCs; we are more stylish, more aluminum, more good-looking, more thin, more attractive, more beautiful, and more gorgeous.  Instead, I will simply tell you how awful it is to be PC.

The elite PCs will tell you that you’re deplorable for using a Mac.  Well, guess what?  We’re going to march right into Silicon Valley and tell security to “get ‘em outta here!”  Man, I’d like to punch a PC in the face.

Our country isn’t what it used to be, folks.  Crime.  Violence.  ISIS.  Internet Explorer being renamed “Microsoft Edge,” even though it’s just as bad as Explorer.  It’s a mess!  And do you really think buying a Crooked PC is going to be the solution?  No.  People don’t want PC; people want action.  People want to Make America Mac Again.  And let me tell you, we’re gonna do it, and we’re gonna do it yuge.  

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